➶ ic contact

[trickshot]

❝ ...Barton here. Go for it. ❞
_{▸ call | voice mail | text | video | picture ◂}

Comments

[gammas]

Oh, yeah. He has this weird Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde thing going on now.

1/2

[trickshot]

man, no one tells me anything anymore

[trickshot]

okay, so

are you mad at him or is he mad at you or is it just weird

and what about this hyde thing?

[gammas]

I'm not mad at him. I mean, okay, I'm still mad at him. But how can I forgive anyone for what happened to Bruce? They sent him to space!!!!

But it's also really, really weird because he's from WAY before any of that.

And you know, I don't even know what's up with that. I don't understand what it is with all the gamma men and split personalities! One second he's regular ol' Len Samson with short hair, the next, he's creepy, jerk-off Samson with long hair.

[trickshot]

i don't even know what the hell tony was thinking with any of that. why didn't anyone tell him to get his head out of his ass?

don't ask me to explain you gamma people. like i'd get it more than you.

but if he's from before, what's the problem?

[gammas]

Because he kept it a secret from EVERYONE. I found out by accident and even then, he refused to believe that he was wrong! I bet he didn't even think he was wrong after Bruce came back and tried to KILL everyone.

It's just super awkward! Because it's like, I'm still mad at him, but he doesn't even know why I'm mad at him. And it's weird and just. It's WEIRD.

[trickshot]

oh yeah

because when someone's trying to kill me i always continue to be an ass (good job tony)

but, okay. if he doesn't know you're mad at him and he hasn't done anything yet, maybe you should just give him the benefit of the doubt?

[gammas]

Tony's a jerk.

Yeah, I suppose. It just feels like any wrong thing can blow up to be something horrible. I don't even know if he's talked to Tony about Bruce yet! How would I bring something like that up?

[trickshot]

"dear doc,

have you made any really stupid decisions lately? and was tony involved?

love, jen."

see? easy.

[gammas]

It's not THAT easy.

Is it?

[trickshot]

i don't know, maybe? if he acts confused, then just drop it.

[gammas]

Yeah, I guess you're right. I'm probably making a mountain out of a gamma-radiated molehill anyways.

[trickshot]

i think you're entitled to

all this time stuff is the worst

[gammas]

I hate it! I wouldn't mind the whole trapped-in-an-alternate-universe thing if all of these timeline shenanigans weren't involved.

[trickshot]

well at least you're pretty far forward and know most things

meanwhile i'm sitting here wondering why i'm going to have a midlife crisis in the future!

[gammas]

Are you kidding me? I'm like, the furthest ahead out of everyone and I still don't know anything because no one tells me anything!!! Aarrgh!

And you don't get a midlife crisis. You get a costume change and you cut your hair and it's a silly haircut.

[trickshot]

well when i get back i'll tell you things

i don't know what, but there will be things.

and i am definitely going to have a midlife crisis. pietro said they rope me into teaching! and i like this costume. i just got it back.

[gammas]

Yeah, well, you haven't told me anything yet so I'm not holding my breath. No offense.

What???? See what I'm saying about no one tells me anything?? Why would you even teach? You're the last person I'd imagine as a teacher.

[trickshot]

well maybe if you were easier to get a hold of i could tell you things!

and i don't even know. i was already splitting my time at home. maybe i get the superpower of being everywhere at once.

[gammas]

I am the easiest person to get a hold of! How do you think they get me on all these teams? They just ring me up and go, "Hey, Shulkie! Mind joining Nighthawk and Krang to fight whatever?" And I'm like, "Yeah, sure! I don't have anything better to do!" You're just not trying hard enough.

If you keep that up, you're going to be the next Wolverine.

[trickshot]

well i'm sorry i was busy trying to rescue steve and then stop osborn from tearing down asgard and then going to spain to track a dirty bomb! and, oh yeah? as soon as i get to catch my breath i'm here! you could have called me.

i don't want to be the next wolverine. i'm way cooler than him, anyway.

[gammas]

I don't even get invited to these things!!! I mean, I know I'm not an Avenger anymore, but it's not like I can't be included too! Like, what about that thing with the hammers, huh? No one asked me to help except for Howard the Duck! And I'm just as busy as you are and it's like, we barely talk anymore -- I'd end up calling you in the middle of like, some huge Avenger-y thing or something!

You're so going to be the next Wolverine. You're going to be EVERYWHERE.

[trickshot]

well you could just come drop in. whatever avenger-y thing was going on, you could help. and then we could talk.

well i can't blame everyone if they want my help but they really need to form a line, or something.

[gammas]

Or you can just come visit me. You should do that instead.

I bet it's the new haircut that attracts everyone. I hate the new haircut.

[trickshot]

yeah but if you came and saw me you could visit everyone else, too.

it's a haircut. how bad could it be?